The Keeper of the Gate.

I’ve been given the most remarkable experience.  I’ve sought to convey the immensity of emotion that lies trapped within my heart regarding it a multitude of times, but it only escapes flawed.  It seems that words, although they are the fixation of my life, cannot describe the overwhelming affections that surround these circumstances.  So although I attempt at expressing my tender happening, you will have to remember that the significance of the event to my heart is extended beyond anything that can be released by my tongue. 

A few weeks ago I was given the opportunity of reuniting with my biological grandparents.  I existed through life without these individuals by my side, but because my love for them imprinted my core, they were entwined into every piece of my living.  Being within their presence is a day that I have craved for as long as my memory can recall.  The chance to be with them was presented many months ago, but the complexities of my heart originally produced fear, not elation.  Pausing this reconnection was the most tragic thing I have caused myself.  However, the whisperings of insecurities steered me away, panicking myself that I would be nothing but a terrible disappointment to them.  Satan was my puppeteer.  Instead of cutting the strings, I allowed to be dragged around as a pawn to the arrival of distressing destinations.  I have a sensitive, dear husband.  He is gentle and his words never exit his mouth in haste, nor do they become cluttered with rushed perspectives.  Through my years with such a tender man, I have learned to quickly follow guidance that he extends.  During a painful portion of my experience, he quietly, but firmly, recommended I move onward.  Meet them, was his request.  I followed.

My grandparents live quite a distance from me.  As I came into their city, all anxieties were set free.  There was a moment I believed I was experiencing heart failure, brought on by an absence of oxygen.  It was as though my lungs concluded their labors, and left me alone to locate my next breath.  As I approached their home, the most endearing man wait for my presence.  As I pulled into view, he excitedly waved his arms into the air.  My first glance upon him instantly softened the weight that was standing on top of my heart.  I opened my car door, and within an instant they were at my side.  In their joy they had raced to be near me, something I could never have envisioned occurring.  Me?  They were exultant to see me?  I still struggle with such comprehension.  Their affectionate arms wrapped around me so rapidly, so tightly.  It was an embrace I never wanted to part from.  It was a place I had never been positioned prior.  The only way to explain it is…love.  Torrential tears doused my cheeks.  My heart…it seemed to come alive.  It beat wildly, as though without them, it could only supply a weakened rhythm, but with them it could create a pounding that could be heard from the exterior.  Missing portions of my soul flew into their proper place.  And then in an instant I felt it…home.    

This experience is so precious to me because of the temporal completion it created in my life.  But beyond that, it provided an illuminated recognition of what it will be like to return to my heavenly home.  The home my spirit hungers for.   This event, although perfected in an earthly sphere, was a mortal moment, which means that it only holds a fragment of correspondence to what our heavenly experience will entail.  Encountering the depth of this experience, and the fantastic emotions of delight which it carried, makes me ache for my divine reconnection.  It has heightened my desires towards righteousness, for when I am allowed to return to Him, I want my reunion to be matchless.  

Can you imagine the way our Father waits for us?  I have never had to endure one of my babies being absent from my side for longer than mere hours, yet even in this short period of separation, coming back to them creates inexpressible happiness.  We are mortal, flawed parents, yet we feel these deep affections.  He is a celestial, perfected Father.  His yearnings for his homebound children are beyond our understanding, and He awaits with arms, which are held open, permeating with His ultimate love.  Those arms, they anticipate us.  Individually.  We are never yearned for in a collective manner, because we are cherished in an individualized way.  We are not seen as a face amongst a sea of His children, but are adored separately.  He knows every component of us.  He is aware of every element that composes who we are.  He desires you to be home with Him again.  He watches you everyday, yearning to have you in His presence.  His greatest happiness comes from the homecoming of each one of His children.  All He seeks is to have His beloved child back at His side.  We cannot forget how distinctive His love for us is.  Nor can we leave behind the understanding that our return home is something that He deeply anticipates.  We are uniquely important to Him.

My best loved parable is that of The Prodigal Son.  The parable is dear to me because it echoes much of my personal experience in coming to Him.  I especially appreciate the MormonMessage created around this scripture.  The visualization impacted my heart.  We understand that the father in this story represents our Heavenly Father.  As I viewed the video, being mindful of this symbolism, I was touched to my core as I watched the father react to seeing his child on the pathway home.  He detects him from a far way off, and immediately runs to him.  He never stops racing to be at his child’s side. When he is close, his arms fall open, and he meets his child with an embrace that spills with compassion and joy.  His son is home.  His child is within His reach again. His desires have become an actuality.  It’s overwhelming to watch. 

The representation of our anticipated reunion within this parable is flawless.  He is unfailingly and anxiously looking for us to embark on the passage that will lead us to Him.  When He sees us taking our first step towards advancement, He does not delay in hastening to our side.  He remains with us as we continue forward, until the time we are able to depart from this mortal probation, to enter our heavenly home, to be encompassed in His love.  This is not to claim that He deserts us if we exist on paths that lead away from Him, for He never departs.  But much like the prodigal son, it is us that pulls ourselves from His presence in these moments.  Our ambitions and determinations maneuver towards worldly targets, and we commence in walking in a direction in which He views the back of us as we withdraw.  Our eyes leave His.  We begin to feel disconnected, because His tangible hands are regularly discerned as our souls are striving towards our homeward objective.  He does not leave us, it is us who abandon Him.  He forever waits on us, seeking for us to pivot, and desiring for the destination of our course to be modified, centering on Him, focusing on home.  

Our reunion can be glorious, providing the most unequaled experience which will entirely engulf our hearts.  However, we must never lose sight of the gate that exists before entering His presence.  A polluted spirit cannot enter the gateway, because they are unprepared to be with Him.  Some may proclaim that such a belief is fictitious, and that because our Father loves us, the pathway leading to him is broad and welcomes all.  This erroneous view was created from the father of all lies.  He is aware of the gate.  He knows that if we are distracted, when we arrive, we will become subject to his dominion, not given the gift of entrance.  He enjoys in poisoning our perspectives because it delays, or diminishes, our promised rewards.  He understands that entry into those gates will not be given unto him, and he is on a quest to capture as many of Heavenly Father’s children as possible, that they may suffer an identical fate.  Don’t be convinced in his altering of truth.  For the pathway was never created by him, but was carved by our Father.  Knowing that He is unchanging, we can have faith that like Him, this pathway is fixed, an irreversible course home.  It cannot, nor will it ever be, adapted or modified to align with worldly transformations.  It is a constant path, one that leads to a gate that we must be certified to cross.  And the most significant part of this gate is in the one who stands waiting outside.

…Behold, the way for man is narrow, but it lieth in a straight course before him, and the keeper of the gate is the Holy One of Israel; and he employeth no servant there; and there is none other way save it be by the gate; for he cannot be deceived, for the Lord God is his name. (2 Nephi 9:41)

Jesus Christ, He is the Keeper of the Gate.

There is an incredible amount of depth within this single verse.  In studying it I have gained an intensified awareness of my Savior’s love for me, as well as His extensive devotion to the Father.  Christ protects His Father and His sacred presence.  He stands on the exterior of that gate as a judge, ensuring that no impure spirit be permitted.  He is the ultimate assessor because He cannot be deceived.  He knows all things.  His knowledge of our deeds, words, and intents are not a developing recognition, but instead a precisely finalized understanding.  His omniscience allows Him to provide supreme justice.  He is conscious of the gravity that only the spotless be admitted.   He safeguards His Father, His Father’s kingdom, and His Father’s perfected children.  Nothing that will add blemish to the celestial will be allowed.  This He ensures by His hand.  Knowing that we will meet our Savior face to face, accounting to Him our actions, engagements, and entertainments, should not produce fear, but should add spiritual power to our lives.  Keeping this in the forefront of our minds, the accentuation of all we do, can change a temporal perspective, to an eternal one.  We will have the strength to better our choices, improve our actions, and discern the filthiness of worldly ideologies.  We must allow this to energize our resolve towards righteousness, and extend our spiritual foundations, instead of enabling it to crumble these sacred structures by way of fright.  Fear is never produced from the Lord, this is prescribed by Satan. 

Understanding that we are all imperfect, that we have all sinned, and that we have all blotched our cleanliness, I find such symbolism in the fact that Our Savior stands waiting.  His Atonement, through the process of repentance, is what washes us clean from our sins.  In our final steps of returning home, as we seek to enter our Father’s gates, Christ positions Himself to meet us first, that He may stand at our side as we come into our Father’s presence.  The One who has been positioned alongside us, never faltering, throughout our entire existence.  He again, stands with us as we arrive home.  His sacrifice is what has authorized our entry. Without Him we would be incapable.  His attendance with us provides physical fortification, as well as symbolism that we have been cleansed from our imperfections by and through Him.  What a unparalleled method of entry.   As we speak of the divine justice that is provided through Him, we must also recognize the divine mercy He releases.  Just as the Lord has a perfect knowledge of our state of cleanliness, He, too, has a flawless remembrance of our acts of righteousness.  The quiet, unnoticed moments we virtuously stood.  He extends His grace unto us.  He is a just Lord.  He is a merciful Lord.

My most favored portion of this verse: …He employeth no servant there.  Our welcoming is not insignificant or lightly handled by our Savior.  He does not give angels charge over this most glorious of moments.  He gives this duty to no one, for He wants to fulfill it Himself.  He wants to be there when you arrive at the gates.  He wants to receive you.  He wants to be the first to open His arms to greet you.  He wants to stand with you as you come unto the Father.  He wants to be the one.  Why?  Because you are that important, you are that special, you are that unique, you are that vital to Him.  He was a perfect being, never having sinned, but loved us so completely that He suffered unimaginably, so that when we reached those gates, justice permitting, we could enter by His grace.  He knows how deeply our Father loves us.  His knowledge of this love is perfect.  That is why He gave all that we may have a way to come unto Him.  He wants to commence our sublime reunion home.  He desires to abide with us as we cross through those gates, where our Father will come rushing to our side, arms thrown around us, joy spilling from His face.  For His precious child,  they have returned home.